Introduction

In 1997, while the world was grappling with Beanie Babies and the emergence of dial-up internet, Konami graced the PlayStation with 'Goal Storm '97'. This game promised soccer action as thrilling as a 90-minute referee debate. But does it deliver? Let's lace up our pixelated cleats and find out.

Gameplay

You might be thinking, ‘Another soccer game? How original!’ But hold your horses—or should I say, hold your soccer balls? 'Goal Storm '97' brings 32 international teams to the digital pitch, allowing you to represent your nation with the pride of an undercooked potato. You have a plethora of modes to choose from, including Exhibition Mode (spoiler: nothing like TV exhibitions), the International League (where you realize your national team has no chance), and an International Cup (which sounds prestigious unless you’re losing to a 12-year-old). Movement feels a bit clunky, reminiscent of your Aunt wheezing after attempting the Macarena. However, when you finally score—oh boy, the fleeting joy you feel! The controls are simple and designed for multiplayer chaos, ensuring that friendships are tested with every missed penalty shot and accidental own goal. Just kick the ball, and pray the disaster doesn’t end with your console crashing.

Graphics

Let’s address the elephant—or should I say, the football—in the room: the graphics. They are about as sharp as a butter knife, but in nostalgia terms, they might as well be from the Sistine Chapel. Character models are charmingly basic, looking more like cardboard cutouts than real athletes. The backgrounds? Imagine an artist’s attempt at painting while wearing blindfolds. You can tell they tried, and much like your last attempt at baking, there’s something strangely endearing about it. Nevertheless, this isn’t a complete visual disaster—there’s a certain retro charm. Think of it as vintage fashion. Yes, it may not be runway-ready, but it’s got its own vibe.

Conclusion

'Goal Storm '97' delivers on soccer action in a way that makes you want to yell at the TV, even if it's just your very patient friend controlling their team. It’s a love letter to simpler gaming times, where the graphics may fall short, but a great couch co-op experience never does. Sure, it won’t replace the FIFA franchise anytime soon, but if you want to relive the 90s while suffering minor digital injuries at the hands of your companions, then kick back and enjoy the storm. Just remember—not all storms are bad; some just help cultivate nostalgia. Own goals, not included.

See Prices for Goal Storm '97 on PlayStation on Ebay